Let's Kill Hitler:The Doctor's Point of View
by Wolf-lover-girl
Summary: Episode 6.8, my new all time favorite episode, Let's Kill Hitler in the Doctor's Point of View! Read what he thought whilst being posioned, and as he gradually begins to realize how much he loves River!
1. Crop Circle

**_Wow..._**

**_How amazing was Let's Kill Hitler?_**

**_It's my new favorite episode!_**

**_It was so funny! "You big Ginge!"_**

**_So sad, "...Help me..."_**

**_The acting was brilliant! Particularly Matt and Alex!_**

**_Anyways, all my reviewers for my other story- .net/s/7034835/1/11_Amy_Pond_The_moment_that_changed_everything Have been begging for me to write another fanfiction, and I loved this episode, and I love writing Doctor Who fanfics, so hence, Let's Kill Hitler in the Doctor's point of view was created!_**

**_Please review, it's like getting paid for me, reading a review, even if your completley mean to me! :D_**

**_Disclaimer: I regrettably don't own either Doctor Who or Matt Smith, if only dreams could come true..._**

**_Enjoy!_**

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><p>The fact that the sun is shining in the small country-side town, I had to admit, got my hopes up. It's not often I got to relax-normally I was too hyped up, and sitting still was antagonistic to my hyperactive personality.<p>

The shops are bustling with activity, I am jostled by the crowd who seem intent on getting home to enjoy the unusually good weather. I still don't know what I'm searching for, it is all a mixed-up jumble, and days had blurred into weeks, weeks into two months since I had seen the Ponds...

You have got to be joking me...

I am on the trail of the latest clue (obtained from admittedly an unreliable source) that Melody was in the general Leadworth area, and as I scour the streets, hoping with all my might that Rory and Amy are too busy working, (Well, in all fairness, I don't want Amy to be working...) I catch sight of something out of the corner of my eye. I turn immediately, and pick the battered newspaper up, staring with shock at the headline. **"No...they couldn't have..." **I groan aloud, slapping my forehead with my hand.

Could they really be that stupid?

A picture of a crop circle (a field where humans grew corn, you think they would call it a corn circle...) dominates the front page. But it's no ordinary crop circle. This one is shaped in the words, Doctor!

**"If you want that you'll have to pay!" **A gruff voice says impatiently.

I barely glance at the owner of the voice, and press a handle of notes into his hands, too absorbed in the story to hear his exclamation of surprise, then he was gone without a word.

A tiny house, hidden in the back of the photo, Amy's house.

I was going to kill the both of them...

I tugged on the collar of my trench coat, the stiflingly hot weather making me feel uncomfortable. I had seen it lying in the recesses of my under-used wardrobe on the Tardis, and thought I may as well get some use out of it.

Sighing, I tuck the paper under one arm, and head to the place where the Tardis was concealed...

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><p>The roar of an engine is deafening, and I hear Amy screaming instructions to a stressed-sounding Rory, who I could see was driving a battered, muddy Mini car. I lean nonchalantly against the Tardis door, dreading this meeting.<p>

How could I confront Amy and Rory and tell them that I still haven't found their daughter? How could I look Amy in those passionate hazel eyes and tell her I was failing in my promise to find her daughter?

The car screeches to a halt, and after some persuasion to the doors, Amy and Rory clamber out, Rory looking sheepish, Amy looking brazen and bold.

I wave the paper at them, not bothering with a greeting. They knew I would come, they knew the second they concocted this insane, yet brilliant plan to draw my attention.

**"Seriously?" **I say, rather colder than I had intended.

Rory spread his arms in a helpless gesture. **"Well you never answer your phone." **He points out, and I flinch, before recovering faster than they can comprehend.

I had heard the constant phone-calls. It was a police telephone box after all, whenever there was a call, you could hear the ringing from any room. I had taken to curling up with my hands over my ears, trying with every fibre of my being not to pick up the phone, and talking Gallifreyan nonsense to try and block it out.

**"Okay you've had all summer." **Amy begins, her Scottish voice saturated with impatience.

I try not to contradict her. All summer means nothing to a Time Lord. It was like explaining how bow-ties are cool to Amy.

She slams the door shut, and strolls towards me, her eyebrows knitted together with worry. Since I'd been away, she'd aged slightly, you could see it in her pained eyes and prematurely aged face, not that I'd ever tell her that, she would probably kill me before I got the words out... **"Have you found her? Have you found Melody?"**

The hopefulness in her voice nearly makes me crumble, and drop my, in Rory's words, _Mr Cool,_ act.

I walk towards her, trying not to look her in the eye, before glancing at Rory and back at Amy. I wanted to wrap her in my arms, tell her everything would be okay, but I knew, since her husband was present, I shouldn't be too arrogant and flaunt our closeness in his face. **"Permission?" **I ask him quietly, offering the newspaper to him in almost a bribe.

**"Granted." **He says gruffly, considerately stepping away from us and scanning the paper.

I finally look in her sad, green eyes, and see my own reflection in them. She looks at me with such eagerness, like waiting for me to shout **"Gotcha!" **and present her with baby Melody, but of course, I had no inkling where she was.

I wrap my arms around her, and pull her close, feeling her heartbeat pound against my double. We've hugged before, but this feels different. It feels tense. Like a sling-shot with the rubber string pulled back, taut and ready to cause pain.

**"You know who she grows up to be." **I say firmly, trying to reassure myself that I wasn't a failure, as well as Amy's benefit. **"So you know I will find her."**

She pulls back, fixing me with a penetrating look. **"But you haven't yet."** She says, sounding morose.

I sigh, and we look at each other, both unwilling to say what we really feel. I want to tell her I'm sorry for screwing up her life and how I will probably not find her daughter for a while, and she wants to yell at me, _demand _that I find Melody without even resting until I do.

I also want to tell her that I haven't, and won't rest until I find her daughter. It has been and always will be until I find her, my number one priority.

**"Hang on, what's this?" **

Rory's voice interrupts our intense eye-conversation, and I turn to him, confused.

**"What's this bit?"**

We both run over, and Amy looks over my shoulder. It's the newspaper, with the crop circle photo, and Amy traces a line through the letter O.**"That wasn't us?" **She says, evidently confused.

Without thinking, I snatch the paper, studying it intently, and turning from Amy and Rory. There was a line cut through the letters, which I hadn't seen. I flail around, trying to act as if I know what's happening, and hold the paper at arm's distance, studying it. **"Umm...Emm..."**

Amy and Rory are at my shoulders, staring at the photo.

The deafening roar of an engine interrupts my thoughts, and I lower the paper to see a red shining car driving full-speed towards us...


	2. Mels

_**I'm not the least bit tired, so I thought I'd add in Chapter 2! **_

_**Thanks to my subscribers :D**_

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><p>Three simultaneous screams echo through the crop circle as the car hurtles towards us, the driver looking hell-bent on running us over. Amy and Rory run for it and dive out the way, and the car turns slightly, and is heading full speed towards me.<p>

I don't have time to even think before I dive out of the way, hurtling to the ground with a soft _thump. _My face is pressed against the damp grass, and I spit grass out of my mouth. Groaning, I hear a car door open, the slam shut, and stare at a pair of boots, before half-turning and facing my would-be assailant.

A tall, twenty something girl with cocoa skin and braided hair, with an air of mockery and confidence that made me groan again. She looked like the sort of person that liked bossing people around and being in control; but that was my job. It was debatable whether or not I was...skilled...in it, and how often I got people into trouble was a contributing factor, but nevertheless, it was my job to boss everyone around.

**"You said he was funny...you never said he was hot!" **Her voice is distinctly English, and laden with sarcasm.

Wait...is she talking about me?

Amy and Rory are storming towards us, Amy looking shocked, Rory looking nervous but annoyed. Thinking it would be best to stay on the ground (Standing next to Amy on a full-blown rage was open suicide), I merely lay there, listening to their conversation.

**"Mels? What are you doing here?"**Amy demands, looking shaken.

Mels? Who named their kid Mels?

**"Following you, what do you think?" **She replies, smirking, which makes me grimace. Great. Now Amy's going to have a fit...

Thinking it would be best to at least_ try _to keep these two apart, I place two hands on the shining red car (If it was blue then it would have been cooler) and pulled myself into a standing position.

**"Umm, where did you get the car?"**

**"It's mine!"** Mels says defensively.

As soon as she finishes speaking, sirens erupt from all sides, and I sigh inwardly. Well, this was going well...

**"Ish."** Mels adds, still sniggering.

Amy and Rory both groan loudly at this- apparently this was common for Mels. **"Not again!" **They echo in unison.

Thinking it was time to interrupt, I step forward saying, **"Sorry, hello! Doctor not following this! Doctor very lost!"**

Recalling what Mels had said first to me, I turn indignantly to Amy, adjusting my coat. **"You never said I was hot?" **I demand, appalled.

Amy makes a face at me, and Rory stares from her to me, about to speak, but Mels astonished voice interrupts us. **"Is that the phone box? The-Bigger-On-The-Inside-Phonebox?" **She demands eagerly.

Something about her...the way she walks, as if she commandeers everyone...

NO! No-one strokes the Tardis! That's my jo-

Moving on!

I turn to her, stepping so I am facing her. **"Time Travel, that's just brilliant!"**

I lean against the Tardis, sending telepathic thoughts to her. _**"Records for Mels?"**_

_**"None."**_

None? How can there be _none?_

**"Yeah I've heard alot about you! I'm their best mate." **She says, almost snidely.

**"Then why don't I know you?" **I demand, eyebrows raised. _Or more importantly, how can the Tardis not find a record?_

I cast my mind back to the wedding, scanning through the faces with my mind, but I don't remember her. **"I danced with everyone at the wedding. The women were brilliant! The men were a bit..." **I remember the terrified look I got when asking Amy's Uncle to dance. **"Shy."**

She turns away, and says, **"I don't do weddings."**

The sirens are getting closer now, and Amy Rory and I exchange frantic looks.

**"And that's me out of time." **She says regretfully. I see her touch her hips, and before I can reach for the sonic, she is pointing a revolver at me with a smirk.

**"Mels!"  
><strong>

**"For God sake Mels!"**

Amy and Rory's furious yells have no effect on Mels, who is studying me for any signs of weakness, but I fix her with my winning smile, and I see her falter, but recover swiftly.

Mels turns to them, **"I need to get out of here. Now."**

Raising my hands in a placating gesture, I glance at the Tardis. **"Anywhere in particular?"** I ask, feeling resigned. There wasn't much I could do, I didn't like the idea of being shot in Leadworth by some insane friend of Amy's.

**"Well let's see."** She smirks, and keeps the gun level at my chest. **"You've got a Time Machine, I've got a gun."**

I didn't like where this was going...

**"What the Hell...Let's Kill Hitler."**


	3. Crash Landing

**Thanks for all the reviews and story alerts and favorites! :D**

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><p>Amy Rory and I stare at Mels in astonishment.<p>

_Is she insane?_

**"Your joking right?" **I say with a forced laugh. There is no way in _Hell_ I am letting her _near _any historical figure. Who knows what kind of mayhem would ensue? It was bad enough letting Amy near Winston, she wouldn't stop staring at him!

Then again I see where she's coming from.

I wouldn't mind killing Hitler before he had the chance to kill millions of innocent people...

_No!_

**"Of course not." **She says breezily. **"Hurry up and take me there, or I will shoot you." **She adds fiercely.

**"This isn't funny Mels!" **Amy says angrily, but looks shocked as the muzzle of the gun turns to her.

**"I didn't say it was."**

I feel anger welling up inside me, and I try to bottle it up and keep a calm face, but the sight of Mels pointing a gun carelessly at Amy made it impossible to do so. I stepped in front of her, face drawn back in a snarl. **"Don't even think about touching either of them."** I say quietly, and push open the door to the Tardis.

She skips inside, and I hear her exclamation of surprise at the inside. I turn to Rory and Amy. **"Who the Hell is she?" **I demand, eyes narrowed.

**"Our best friend." **Amy explains.

**"Ex best friend." **Rory mutters, stepping into the Tardis. Amy looks at me apologetically, and I motion for her to step inside, and she complies.

**"Don't touch anything!" **I yell at Mels as I close the door softly behind me, seeing her staring with amazed curiosity at the console.

She swings the gun round again, levelling it at my chest. **"Go on." **She gestures to the console, and I sigh.

**"Why do you want to kill Hitler?"** I demand, but she purses her lips and doesn't answer. Rory and Amy take residence in the swivelly chair that has been a source of amusement for me during the rare dull periods when Amy and Rory were sleeping.

I flick a switch and pull down a lever, and we are off, hurtling towards Berlin during Hitler's reign.

Mels smirks at me, and says, **"I could easily just shoot you and take your box right now."** She points out.

_Box? Did she just call the Tardis a...No..._

**"TARDIS." **I say through gritted teeth. **"Time and Relative Dimension In Space." **

**"Whatevs!"**

Glancing at a worried looking Amy, I straighten my jacket and beam at Mels. **"Guns don't work on the Tardis. She's a temporal grace." **I lie easily.

She looks unsure, and looks at Amy and Rory who are nodding firmly, but hesitantly.

And the Oscar for Worst Liars in the Universe go to...

**"Maybe we should test that theory?"**

Before I can react, she fires the gun at the Tardis console, and immediately, warning bells start shrieking and dense smoke fills the air.

She **_shot _**my Tardis!

I stare at the place where Mels shot with anger and upset. **"You've shot it!"** I cried. **"You shot my Tardis!"**

I turn to her angrily, and she is clinging to the railings in an attempt to stand upright. Amy and Rory are flung out of the chair, and using each other for support, stand shakily.

**"It's your fault!"** Mels yells over the hissing noise.

Taking a whiff of the gas, I recoil, yelling, **"Agh!" **It was definitively poisonous gas, and we were inhaling it!

I turn to her, and the Tardis lurches, causing me to fall, but I swiftly grab the railing, glaring at Mels. **"How is it my fault!" **I yell uselessly.

I pull the brakes, and fiddle with some knobs but nothing seems to be working. We were crashing!

_She's Amy's best friend, what do you expect..._

**"You said guns don't work in this place!" **Mels points out. Amy is holding onto the railings, and Rory is desperately trying to remain upright. **"You said we were in a state of temporal grace!"**

_She actually believed me?_

I tug again on the brakes with all the strength I have, but it doesn't budge. **"That was a clever lie, you idiot!" **I yell indignantly. **"Anyone could tell that was a clever lie!"**

**"Where are we?**" Amy screams as the Tardis causes us all to topple to the floor.

We all lie on the floor, and I revel in the oxygen, breathing deeply. I glance upwards to see the gas has spread, covering the whole Tardis, and I begin coughing instinctively as the gas enters my lungs. I see Mels crawling along the floor to reach the revolver, but I swiftly push myself forwards, grabbing it and holding it to my chest, and she glares at me with a new kind of hatred.

Why does she hate me? I don't even know her!

Another lurch, and I can't help yelling as the Tardis collides with something outside, and the sound of glass smashing fills my ears.

We have finally stopped, but everyone is coughing, and I stand, lurching around drunkenly. I grasp the railing with a shaking hand, and pull a handkerchief out of the trench coat pocket and hold it to my mouth and nose, choking.

I am nearest to the door, so immediately stand, yelling to the three bedraggled people who are trying to stand, coughing erratically. **"Gas! Out now!" **I yell, my voice muffled by the material.

I wrench open the door, and stumble out, Rory close behind.

**"Out out out! Everyone get out!" **I yell, watching them stumble out, coughing and spluttering.

**"Where are we?" **Rory demands, bent double.

**"A room!" **I call, thoughts flying through my mind, taking in the debris. Glass covers the floor, and I see that we have smashed through a window into some sort of office.

**"What room?"**

**"I don't know!" **I admit defensively. **"I haven't memorized every room in the universe! I had yesterday off!"**

Well, yesterday I was actually in a bar on the Eye of Orion...

Not the point!

I glance at Amy and Rory, who are apart and still coughing as the gas starts to fill the room. But where was...

**"Mels!" **I yell, turning to see she is peering into the Tardis. I rip her hand off the door, and after a brief struggle, push her away from the Tardis, saying, **"Bad smoke!" **She saunters away, examining the room. **"Very deadly smoke! Because _someone _shot my Tardis!" **I yell, feeling anger rise again in me.

**"Doctor I think this guy is hurt..."**

Amy and Rory are kneeling by a small man with glasses and a uniform, who is lying sprawled on the floor, unmoving.

**"No wait...I think he's alright." **Rory says finally. Trusting his instincts, I stare down at the gun in my hand, and cast around wildly for a place to put it, feeling uncomfortable holding a weapon.

There is a fruit bowl by the large oak desk, so I place it in there, and see a banana lying innocently in there, and I am about to take it (I haven't eaten all day!) when I hear a soft moan.

I jump back, startled as a man begins to rise, and run a hand through my hair nervously.

What do you tell someone whose office you just destroyed with a giant blue box that bigger on the inside?

Surprise?

Happy birthday?

**"Ooh, hello! Sorry is this your office?"**

Next Sherlock Holmes standing right here...

**"Had a sort of collision with my vehicle."**

Sort of?

**"Faults on both sides..."**

Well, they shouldn't have put their office here!

**"Let's not say any more about...it."**

Oh...dear...Gallifrey.

This is a nightmare.

This can't be real.

The man stands, and I stare at the perfectly trimmed moustache, and the hair sleeked back with enough oil to keep a country running for a decade.

I hear Amy exclaiming in surprise as she recognizes him.

The Tardis has crashed in Adolf Hitler's office...


	4. Melody into River

**_Thanks again to all my reviewers! It really makes me ecstatic getting such positive feedback!_**

**_What you need to keep in mind is, although most of the time the Doctor is thinking random, crazy stuff, he does have an angry side, and he does have occasional angry thoughts..._**

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><p>I can't stop staring at him despite myself. Adolf Hitler. The urge to pick up the gun nestling safely between an apple and a banana was too tempting. How many lives saved, how many lives lived to the fullest...<p>

No! Who knows what would happen if Hitler was killed at this moment? What the repercussions would be?

**"Thank you, whoever you are." **His German tinted soft voice made me scowl momentarily. This was the voice that ordered the extermination of the Jews, and I despised him for it. **"I think you have just saved my life."**

I feel Amy and Rory stiffen behind me, and my mouth flies open, in shock and fear. No...no no no! I did _not _just save _Hitler! _

**"Believe me...it was an accident." **I say stiffly, still in shock.

He swallows and doesn't acknowledge my comment, and instead sees the Tardis, and looks at it with awe. **"What is this?" **He asks, like a small kid presented with a big new shiny toy.

_Not another way for you to massacre millions._

**"What is that thing?"**

As he moves off to investigate, Amy and Rory stand in front of me, and I pull my eyes of the gun and force myself to look at them.

**"How can we have just saved his life? We cannot have just saved Hitler's life!" **Amy says, her Scottish accent betraying her fear.

I open my mouth to speak, but then I remember Mels, and turn angrily, stalking towards her with a scowl. **"You see! Time travel, it never goes to plan!" **

She merely looks at me without any emotion, and rolls her eyes, and I hear Hitler say, **"This box, what is it?"**

I turn slowly, gritting my teeth and clenching my fists in an attempt to calm myself down. Seeing his hands, which have signed countless degrees and laws that have killed so many touching my Tardis makes it worse for me to try and calm my volatile temper.

**"It's a police telephone box." **I snarl. **"From London, England." **His face blanches, and I relish in his fear. **"That's right Adolf...the British are coming."**

I see him staring with horror at something behind me, so I turn quickly on the spot, and see the man who had been lying unconscious on the floor standing. **"No! Stop him!" **Hitler cries, and when I turn back, I see the gun in his hands.

Why do humans have an obsession with guns? So predictable. So easy to stop.

I duck instinctively, without even pausing for a rational thought. Pressed against the hard floor, I hear several shots fired, and I look up in horror as more follow, like sheep following a leader, before finally, Rory, (Always handy to have a Roman around!) steps in, and, (I have to admit, I was impressed) punches Hitler squarely in the face, sending him crashing to the floor.

He swiftly bends down as I stand up, and points the gun at Hitler, his eyes hard, his hands not shaking. **"Sit still, shut up."**

Despite myself, I was even more impressed.

Amy rushes to the man, and holds him steady, making both Rory and I flinch, then look at each other strangely. **"Are you okay?" **She asks swiftly.

An unspoken agreement between Rory and I, an exchange of looks.

**"Yes, yes, I'm fine. I think he missed."**

How could he have missed? He was standing within throwing distance...

**"He was going to kill me!" **Hitler protested, but no-nonsense Rory stepped in. **"Shut up Hitler!"**

Wow...this man was growing on me...

Deciding to take charge of the situation as usual, I pointed at Rory, then Hitler. **"Rory take Hitler and put him..." **I try to think, but my brain was screaming at me, **_"Tell Rory to shoot him!" _**but instead I continued, **"And put him in that cupboard over there." **

It was a stressful day, and not many places you could hide the cruelest man alive.

I hear Rory consent, then mutter to himself as he pushed Hitler into the cupboard, and his protests fell on deaf ears.

I approach the other man carefully, unable to pry my eyes of the symbol of oppression and hatred, the Swastika. I stare into his eyes, which were a cold, dead color, and say, **"Are you okay?" **Hitler couldn't have missed, it was impossible, yet still the man stood there, looking pale but unharmed.

After a brief pause, he says, **"Oh, I..." **And before I can move, falls in a heap.

That was too convenient...no-one could have done that...the best liar in the world could tell that is was a feint faint.

Me.

**"I think he just fainted..."**

No prizes for the Roman...

**"Yes that was a faint..." **I say slowly. **"A perfect faint."**

I look up as Amy's whispered, **"Mels?"**

I turn to Mels, who is standing in a corner, holding a hand to her chest. **"Hitler." **She says quietly, as if in a dream.

**"What about him?" **I ask impatiently. She was the cause of all this, she was the one who-

**"Lousy shot."**

_NO!_

**"Mels!" **

**"Rory!"** I yell, recognizing that his nursing skills would come in handy.

No...no, no no! She can't die! I _refuse _to let that _low-life _kill another innocent person. No-one dies unless I say so.

I kneel by her, staring into her chocolate hard eyes. **"I'm going to stop the bleeding." **Rory says, in his (As I refer to it as) nursing voice.

I look at the bullet hole and wince. A perfect circle, surrounded by gaping charred flesh, and bleeding freely. It didn't look too good.

Feeling a lump in my throat, I look at her again, and try to smile at her reassuringly.

What can you tell a person who is dying?

You'll be okay?

Don't worry?

Those two fatal words, _I promise?_

Her breathing is labored, so I stroke her hair, trying to calm her. **"Just hold on." **

She is struggling to speak, but she manages to say, **"I used to dream about you...****All those stories..Amy used to tell me." **She winces in pain again, so I swiftly say, **"What stories? Tell me what stories! Vampires in Venice, that's a belter!"**

Well, more sexy fish vampires, but that's besides the point!

I was trying to distract her from the pain, but it was no use, I could see she was struggling to breathe and her pupils were dilating.

**"When I was...little...I was going to marry you..."**

What had Amy told her about me? How did she know so much? Amy hadn't told me anything about Mels!

Nevertheless, I feel a duty to say, **"Good idea, let's get married! You get better and we'll get married, deal?" **I had to do something! I couldn't just sit here, watching Rory trying to futilely stop the bleeding!

She chuckles softly, and says, **"Shouldn't you ask my parents permission first?" **She jokes quietly.

That would be a strange meeting.

Hello Mels' parents! Yes, I'm a 908 year old alien, just back from Berlin, 1938 with your daughter who I promised to marry!

**"Soon as your well, I'll get them on the phone!"**

**"Might as well do it now...since they are both right here..."**

Stupefied, I looked at Amy's pale, shocked face, to Rory's mask of confusion.

Mels...

No...

I stare at her with utter shock and horror, and she whispers, **"Penny in the air."**

Penny halfway to bloody space right now!

Amy is looking at me for more information, but I can't digest the fact...No...No...Please no! I don't want to face her now, I _can't _face her now!

I had never dreaded a meeting with her, but today, I couldn't...I wouldn't be able to look her in the eyes, after Demon's Run.

As I stand slowly, regretfully, her hands are bathed in a yellow light.

_The _yellow light. The light of the untempered schism, flowing through her body, getting ready to morph...

Into...

**"What the Hells going on?" **Rory demands, as they both stand, and back away with me from Mels.

If I am witnessing Melody becoming River...and she doesn't know she is River, and has been raised by _her_, that means...

That mean's she is going to try her very hardest to kill me.

I grab both of their hands, and yank them back, my Time Lord strength overpowering their maternal and paternal need to stay near Mels, and yell, **"Back! Back back back!"**

Mels stands, yellow light streaming from her body, and she examines her hands with mild curiosity.

**"Last time I did this, I ended up a toddler in New York."**

**"Okay Doctor, explain what's happening please!" **

I hated those words. The half-formed words of hope, of optimism. The Doctor will know what's happening, and fix it. That's what _he does_. That's what he's _meant for._

**"Mels..." **I say quietly, after coming to a definite answer that the regenerating girl in front of us is the elusive fox herself, River Song. **"Short for..."**

**"Melody." **Mels nods, looking chuffed that I caught on so quickly.

**"So I named my daughter after her!" **Amy moans, sounding dire.

**"No...you named your daughter...after your daughter..."**

Timey-Wimey to the extreme...

Rory stares at me, and it clicks. **"Took me years to find you two." **Mels says quietly. **"I'm so glad I did." **She grins toothily. **"And you see? It all turned out well in the end." **

As she is talking, focusing her full attention on her parents, I lean back, and with two swift movements, take the ammo out of the pistol concealed in the fruit bowl, and slip it into my trench coat pocket, along with my sonic.

I wasn't taking any chances.

**"You got to raise me after all."**

Amy and Rory are staring at their daughter with horror-struck faces. **"Your Melody?" **Amy exclaims in astonishment.

Rory is quicker to the chase, the pinnacle of the dire situation we were in. **"But if your Melody...that also means your..."**

**"Oh shut up Dad." **Mels snaps, smirking. **"I'm focusing on a dress size.."**

I blush as I remember with embarrassment that River was a Size 10...How did I know that?

Mels suddenly spreads her arms, and her head jerks towards the ceiling as she is totally bathed in the eerie yellow light of regeneration, and a long scream is ripped from her throat.

As Amy and Rory cower beneath the table, a metallic glint causes me to turn, and I see a gun, lying harmlessly on the armchair. Thinking swiftly, under the cover of Melody regenerating and Amy and Rory hiding, I leap over in two strides, grab the gun and click the barrel, and the shells fall harmlessly to the floor, and I kick them under the armchair.

Melody is starting to look like different now, so I rush back over, and press myself against the desk, as Melody starts to morph...

Into River Song.


	5. Aftermath of Regeneration

_**Thanks again to the ever-increasing suscribers, and my awesome reviewers! :D**_

_**And Hey to someone who better be reading this when she wakes up...;D**_

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><p>Could this be more strange?<p>

Maybe if Hitler came out and started ballet-dancing, it would be stranger, but at this moment in time, I would appreciate any excuse not to look at River right now.

Her curly locks are back, as are the green eyes that stare at me with slight shock and amusement.

**"Whoo!" **Her voice sounds excited, but I detect a hint of fear behind it, and I see a glance at me, before she says, **"Right let's see then!" **She shakes her whole body, and I can't help blushing.

**"Ooh it's all going on down there isn't it?" **

Don't look don't look don't look don't look...

Amy and Rory are staggering to their feet, and I look at the floor instead of River.

She touches the bottom of her lion's mane of hair, and looks thrilled. **"Oh the hair! The hair! It just doesn't stop does it?"**

I tug on the ends of my own hair, feeling miffed, but extremely ecstatic that she didn't turn ginger either. Maybe there was a curse where no Time Lords could be ginger...

She runs to the mirror, and examines herself, looking pleased. **"Everything changes!"**

Amy and Rory are staring at me, but I can't peel my eyes of River, nor shake the feeling that despite her quirkiness, something dark and dangerous was at play here.

**"Oh but I love it! I love it!"**

She whirls round to us, and beams jovially. **"I'm all sort of..." **She hesitates to try and find the word. **"Mature!"**

I finally stare at Amy, then look at River, and instantly regret it. **"Hello Benjamin!"**

Oh no no no no...don't do that!

One of her barely concealed legs is on the chair, and I see the muscles in her hand move as she touches something on the chair that makes me smirk for a nano-second, before clamping my hand over my eyes.

This isn't happening! Not looking, not looking, not looking, GOD, why is she doing this to me?

I finally pry my hands off my face, but she is still in the same provocative pose, so I turn to Amy and whisper, **"Whose Benjamin?" **I try not to feel jealous, but it's impossible, just like not being able to stop staring at River...

Why does she torture me like this?

**"The teeth!" **She cries suddenly, gnashing them together.

I swear on the Tardis, if she tries to bite me, I'll never forgive her...

She turns back to the mirror, examining her teeth eagerly, and I feel Rory's gaze on me, so I shrug at him, trying and failing to suppress a laugh.

**"Oh look at them!"**

I'd rather not thank-

Ahhhh!

She had run over to me, pressing me into the wooden desk, staring at me with those intense eyes, which are filled with eagerness, but an underlying anger.

She places her hands on either side of me, saying, **"Watch out that bow-tie!"**

I feel her hands moving by my waist, but she is staring innocently at me, and I make a face in return.

Why is she man-handling me?

And why weren't Amy and Rory getting their daughter off me, considering she was currently jeopardizing my ability to have children...

Her hands move again, and I remember the gun in the fruit bowl.

Was she going to try and kill me?

_My River? _Try to kill me?

Accepting the inevitable, I easily use my hand which is keeping me upright and whirl the fruit bowl around, so the gun is out of reach.

_Please please get off..._

She turns to her parents, basically sitting on my lap, and says, **"Excuse me you lot, I need to weigh myself!"**

I breathe a sigh of relief when she dashes off, and I sit on the desk dejectedly, and Amy sits beside me, looking into the air as if someone will come save us from this Hellish nightmare. Rory claps a hand on my shoulder soothingly, and sits beside me, adopting the same look as me.

I rub my face, thoughts running. If she tried anything like that again...

**"That's Melody?" **Amy asks weakly.

I sniff and nod slowly and reluctantly.

**"That's...River Song..." **Rory sounds depressed.

**"Who's River Song?" **River peers around the doorframe, looking inquisitively at us.

All three of us turn to face her, and I can tell by their faces that Amy and Rory haven't come to the same conclusion I have.

I hesitate for a second, before screwing up my face, knowing that if _my _River knew I was going to say this, she would have probably slapped me.

**"...Spoilers."**

**"Spoilers? What's spoilers?" **She demands, taking a step into the room.

River doesn't know spoilers? What kind of a world are we living in where _River Song_ doesn't know spoilers!

She hesitates, before saying, **"Hang on, there's something I have to check..."**

_Take all the time in the world...and more. _

She disappears again, and we face the front, each of us absorbed in thought.

Rory finally breaks the silence, with a statement that I would say covered my whole life.

**"Is anyone else finding today a bit difficult?"**

Difficult being the understatement, yes!

**"I'm getting a sort of banging in my head." **

I prick up at these words, but before I can say anything about drums, Amy says, **"I think that's Hitler in the cupboard."**

Not everyday you get to say that...

**"That's not helping!" **

I stand, and instantly Amy and Rory jump to their feet. Time for some explaining...

**"This isn't the River Song we know yet..." **I muse, strolling forward, and the duo following like lost puppies. **"This is her right at the start...Doesn't even know her name..."**

**"Ah, that's magnificent!"**

Don't turn round, she's probably half-naked and about to assault you...

The three of us turn haltingly, as River swings into the room, her smile nearly touching her ears. **"I'm going to wear lots of jodphurs!"**

Don't want to know what they are...

**"Well enough of all that!" **She says with an air of mockery. **"Down to business." **

She whips out a gun and aims it at my chest.


	6. Traitorous Kiss

_**This scene and the whole poison scenes were so beautifully acted and created, and I hope I do it justice!**_

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><p>Amy and Rory looked scandalized, and I grin at River, despite the situation. <strong>"Oh hello. I thought were getting married?"<strong>

**"I told you!" **River chides, strolling towards me, the heel of her black spiky boots clicking off the floor. **"I'm not a wedding person!"**

**"Doctor what is she doing?" **Rory mumbles, staring between the gun, River's smirking face and my own grinning face, evidently baffled at the sudden twist of events.

**"What she's programmed to do." **I reply softly. What Kovarian and her minions trained her to do her whole life.

Kill me.

River has stopped in front of me, the gun still aimed at me, but the smile on my face doesn't falter. She doesn't realize how stupid she looks to me right now. She may as well be pointing a water gun at me.

**"Where'd she get the gun?" **Rory asks, puzzled.

**"Hel-lo Benjamin." **I imitate River's lilting voice with a smile which quickly vanishes as I remember her seductive pose. I remember seeing her hand twitch as she picked the gun up with her deft fingers, so quickly that no-one noticed.

Except me.

**"You noticed!" **River purrs, delighted, and clicks the gun, but I don't flinch or move, nor do I crumple to the floor in a heap. I hear Amy jump behind me, and Rory shy away.

**"Of course I noticed."** I grin evilly.

She glares at the gun, and drops it to the floor with a soft bang. **"As soon as I knew you were coming, I tidied up a bit."** I chuckle.

**"I know you did!" **River drawls, pulling out something from her waistcoat, but before she can, I smile viciously and say, **"I know you know."**

This was like a deadly game of Cat and Mouse, the intensity is enough to make someone crumble, but River and I are stronger than that, and she has a mission to kill me or die trying, and I have a mission to live...

Or die trying.

She pulls out the banana from the fruit bowl out of her waistcoat, and stares at it with disbelief, and I give a dry chuckle. If River wasn't trying so hard to kill me, this would be amusing, watching her every move foiled by my mastermind plan.

Yet her moves were significantly weaker than I had excepted from someone who was trained to kill me from birth.

**"Goodness, is killing you going to take all day?" **She complains lightly, and glares at me when I take the banana from her hand.

Poor banana.

I threw it on the armchair, snickering. **"Why, are you busy?"**

**"Oh, I'm not complaining!" **I hear the rise in octave in her voice and she turns, and hear the sound of metal screeching off the desk, so I grab the sonic from my pocket, and before she can stab me, I sonic it.

I hear the metal hiss, before it flies out of her hands, leaving her growling at me. I toss the sonic lightly in the air, catching it with the other hand and replacing it in my pocket. **"If you were in a hurry, you could have killed me in the cornfield!"** I point out.

Why didn't she kill me in the cornfield? Would have been easier, rather than making me travel to Berlin 1938.

**"We'd only just met!" **River exclaims, and she can't know the degree of hurt that pulses through me. Only just met? Now I understand how she felt in the Library when I didn't know who she was. Hurt. Broken. Confused. I turn away from her, so she won't see the sadness that lingers in my eyes. **"I'm a psychopath, I'm not rude!"**

Amy screams, a deafening sound, and Rory yelps as River turns round with the gun from the fruit bowl, clicking it once, twice, three times, but it only clicks, and I pull the cartilage out of my pocket, waving it tauntingly, before, in a gesture that reminded me painfully of _my _River, blew on it.

No joking, light atmosphere in the room now. She stares icily at me, lowering the gun.

**"You were not a psychopath!" **Amy steps forward, her voice heavy with pleading. The two of them return to my shoulders. **"Why would she be a psychopath?"**

Since Kovarian trained her to be. Took everything good out of an innocent little baby and corrupted her, poisoned her mind and soul and heart, until the only thing she wanted to do was kill me.

River drops the gun with a small snarl, and paces towards us, talking to Amy but fixating me with a vicious glare. **"Oh mummy, mummy pay attention." **River murmurs.

River and I begin circling each other, her eyes narrowed in hatred, mine alight with mild curiosity, but deeply saddened by what had happened to the closet living person I had left. **"I was trained and conditioned for one purpose. I was born to kill the Doctor."**

This makes me frown at her. I thought a lot about how she wanted to kill me, but hearing her speak the words cut deep, but I didn't let it show. **"Demons run, remember?" **I direct this rhetorical question at Amy. **"This is what they were building."**

Our circling has stopped, leaving the both of us inches apart, staring into each other's eyes with faint smiles. **"My bespoke psychopath."**

I liked that word. Bespoke. Had a certain...ring to it.

**"I'm all yours, sweetie." **River whispers, and she sounds so alike my own River, that when she presses her lips against mine, I don't react. The kiss is quick, and tastes sweet but leaves a strange taste in my mouth, which I swallow.

Maybe she was returning to normal?

Maybe she was tricking me...

**"Only River Song gets to call me that." **I whisper deadly but still simpering. I have finally realized, this isn't my smirking, playful, admittedly sexy River Song. This is Melody Pond, dangerous war criminal with an obsession to kill me.

**"And whose River Song?"** She asks, in a light whisper.

Who is River Song? This girl who is standing in front of me, after trying and failing many times to kill me?

**"An old friend of mine." **I settle for.

**"Stupid name."**

As she skips away from me, I compose myself. She jumps easily onto the window ledge, peering down at the bustling street below. **"Oh look at that!"**

Amy and Rory approach me cautiously, standing on either side of me, slightly behind at a hand gesture from me. I wouldn't let Melody touch them, not even if she had to kill me.

**"Berlin on the eve of war." **River says slowly, her voice animated with delight.

Speaking of Berlin and war, Hitler was still in the cupboard...

**"A whole world set to tear itself apart."**

She turns to us, but looks only at Amy and Rory. **"Now that's my kind of town. Mum, Dad, don't follow me, and yes, that is a warning." **Her voice is husky and dangerous.

She looks like she is about to climb, or jump down, so I smile teasingly and say, **"No warnings for me then?"** Is she finally going to admit she's failed in her attempts at killing me?

**"No need my love." **She says, and she turns around again. **"The deed is done, and so...are you."**

Was she still trying? I'll give her something, she was stubborn!

Smirking, I step forward, but gasp as pain floods through me, causing me to jerk, and clasp a hand to my double hearts, wincing. What? What was happening? Amy and Rory grab my elbows, Amy worriedly calling, **"Doctor? What's wrong?"**

**"What have you done? River!"**

It hurt...hurt so much. Indescribable pain. Like my hearts were pumping pain through my body instead of blood.

It was my double hearts that hurt the most. It felt like they were being dipped in lava. I gasp again as the pain increases, and River smirks at me. **"Oh, River River River! More than a friend I think!"**

More than my friend.

More than my lover.

My killer.


	7. Poisoned Lips

**_Thanks so much to all my reviewers, every time I get an e-mail saying I have a new review, I can't stop squealing!_**

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><p>I didn't know what was worse.<p>

The intense, excruciating pain, or the look of satisfied triumph and hatred River gives me.

**"What have you done!" **I nearly scream, as the pain intensifies. I try to stay steady on my feet, but a surge of pain forces me to the floor, stopping myself from crashing into it with a shaking hand.

I am on all fours now, shaking and struggling to keep myself from screaming with agony.

Every nerve ending was on fire with pain...

**"It was never going to be a gun for you, Doctor." **River says quietly, her voice seeming distorted to me. I manage to look up to her, eyes watering with pain as I maintain a grip on my chest, feeling my staccato heartbeat begin to quicken. **"The man of peace, who understands every type of warfare, except...perhaps the cruelest."**

The way she moves her lips to speak makes the sunshine from outside shine on them, and I see traces of white powder.

No...she couldn't have...no...River would never _poison _me! River was far too dramatic for that! She would need rounds of machine guns firing through the room!

I put a shaking hand to my lips, and wipe it off, staring at the faint, almost non-existent traces of white on my fingertips, and I remember the taste in my mouth after she kissed me.

Somehow, I don't care that she poisoned me. She was trained to kill me, it's all she knows what to do. The only thing I care about is the cold, steely eyes that show no pity, no remorse towards me.

These are the eyes of a killer.

**"Kiss kiss." **She whispers, blowing a kiss at me, before leaping out of the window.

**"What's wrong with you, what has she done?"** Rory demands, ever the practical one, yet I am surprised neither him, nor a freaked-out looking Amy had sussed out what happened.

**"Poisoned me..." **I hiss, struggling to form words, as every breath I take feels like icy-cold daggers are being plunged into both my hearts simultaneously. The last thing I need for them right now is to start having breakdowns, I mean, their daughter who they thought was their best friend, just regenerated into River Song, who poisoned me.

Confused yet?

**"I'm fine...Well no...I'm dying." **I try and say bravely, but my voice breaks halfway through the sentence and I allow one small wince of pain to take hold. Never thought I would have to say those two words for a long time. I'm dying. So pessimistic, but at this moment in time, it certainly feels like death is clawing me on the shoulder, scythe ready to reap my ancient soul and take it far away from this hell-hole.

I hear Amy gasping, so I fight off the trembling, and continue, **"But I've got a plan!"**

Plan? The only plan I had right now was not screaming my head off because of the agony, but it wasn't working. **"What plan?" **Amy demands, a glimpse of hope in her voice.

I hesitate, before another round of pain causes me to spit out, **"Not dying! See!"**

I try to stand, before instantly regretting it as every muscle in my body yells at me in protest. I let out a cry, and feel my face twist in agony. My arms flail uselessly, and Amy and Rory catch me, helping me to my feet, but Amy wrapped her arms around me, holding me steady, in case I fell (which seemed extremely likely...)

**"Okay, what can we do?" **Amy demands, and I can't help thinking, _Get me some damn morphine! _

Instead I pull the sonic out of my pocket and pass it to Amy. My imminent death meant nothing to me, I had to protect River, mainly because letting her lose in Berlin would probably result in Hiroshima part 2, and because I knew, despite the fact she is the cause of my pain, I lov-

**"Take this, the Tardis can home in on it." **I say faintly.

**"Go find River." **I order Rory, and to my relief, he complies without hesitation. Without anyone to hold me up, trying to walk towards the Tardis is a nightmare, and I groan in agony, before nearly toppling over, until Amy wrapped one of my arms around her.

She holds me steady, and I see my pain reflected in her hazel eyes; she is clearly terrified.

Realizing I was trying to reach the Tardis, Amy assisted me by basically carrying me there, but as we near, we both recoil from the gas. **"You said the smoke was deadly!" **Amy points out, before with a heave, I lean against the Tardis, trying to catch my breath.

**"No the smoke's fine, the poison will kill me first! Now get after River!" **I say, trying to remain cheerful but ultimately failing.

**"I don't understand! One minute she's going to marry you-" **I flinch at these words, **"And the next she's going to murder you?"**

Those words hurt more than Amy thinks possible. These were the questions I had come to a conclusion to not a second ago, **"Ah, she's been brainwashed, it makes sense to her! Plus, she's a woman..." **If Amy could breathe fire, she would be doing so right now. **"Oh shut up I'm dying!" **I snap, with the flicker of a smile.

Summoning the energy, I enter the Tardis, before closing the door with the last of my strength. At last. Home.

The smoke has become thicker, and it nearly blinds me. I start coughing violently, and let out a cat-like mew in pain. **"Extractor fans on!" **I hiss, vaguely remembering the Instruction Manual telling me what to do in an emergency. (I really shouldn't have thrown it into the supernova, but seriously, who needs safety straps?)

**"Oh that works!" **I say, feeling an overwhelming sense of pride in myself as the mechanical sound of fans fills the air, and soon, the gas has disappeared.

I have to reach the console...have to use the emergency systems...

I rush forwards, ignoring the pain for a split second, before it becomes too much to bear, and I collapse on the deck, next to the railings, wheezing like an old man.

On all hands and knees, I stare at the floor, muttering, **"I'm shutting down! Got to have an interface, voice interface! Emergency!" **

This certainly was an emergency...

I sat, resting my head against the railings as a holographic version of myself appears, transparent and shining. In a dull monotone voice, Interface-Me says, **"Voice interface enabled."**

Oh come on seriously? I'm dying, and you want me to spend the rest of the time I have left with _myself? _**"No, no no! Give me someone I _like!" _**I complain irritably.

The holograph version of myself vanishes, and the next holograph is Rose Tyler.


	8. The Holograms

**_Thanks to all my wonderful reviewers and subscribers, you keep me writing! :D_**

**_Now, I am a huggge 11/Amy fan (Sorry Rory!) But I also love River/11, because they are so good and funny together! _**

**_And to my friend, who will probably read this, Mitch is a good name for a meerkat, okay? :D_**

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><p>Her blonde hair cascades to her waist, and her eyes are wide with either shock or happiness, but she is half-turned away from me, as if she doesn't want to see me,<p>

Seeing her hurts. Remembering all the good times and bad times we had, but how, no matter what, she was always there. Until I essentially abandon her. She was one of my many regrets in life. The short period of time we spent together was better than some of the years I spent on Gallifrey.

Yet, as I look at her, I can't help feeling strange. I don't look at her with despair, trying desperately to return for her; the knight in shining armor, desperate to find a way of talking to her again. She's happy now, with John Smith, (my duplicate.) If I had to choose now between visiting her and seeing River one last time, it's no contest who wins.

That's when it hits me, and I am stunned to realize how long it has taken me to appreciate my feelings for River. River, who, despite the fact that she tried to kill me, is always there for me. Is actually _willing _to stand up to me, and boss me around, instead of waiting with puppy-dog eyes for me to take charge. I also didn't realize how, when she wasn't there with me, life just wasn't as fun. I loved the banter between us, and how I can't keep a straight face around her, because we laugh too much. I love how she smiles at me, and would do anything for me. I love how her eyes are so filled with emotion, and her face is always smiling and cheerful.

Thinking these thoughts makes me feel (If possible) even more guilty, and I look sheepishly at the hologram-Rose. **"Oh thanks, give me guilt! **I complain, wheezing.

Rose vanishes, and in her place comes holograph-Martha.

Her I can manage, well better than Rose. She's with Mickey now, so that's one less thing I have to feel guilty for.

Yet what I put her family through?

**"Also guilt!"**

Martha is gone, and a unsmiling Donna takes her place, and I can't bear to look at her. Donna Noble...the runaway bride. Doctor-Donna...she'll never remember the good times we had together. I'll never be able to see her again.

**"More guilt!"**

I pause, trying to think things over. Who could I request as my voice-interface? A friendly face? Someone to talk me through what to do? Someone to help me pull through?

To my shame, I can't think of a single person.

I let out a hoarse yell as the pain (to remind me of it's omnipresence) kicks up, pulling at my duo hearts, causing me to place a hand against it, wincing. My heartbeat, if fast before, it lightning speed now, but instead of pumping blood around my body, is pumping poison.

**"Come _on!_ There must be someone in the universe I haven't screwed up yet!" **

Seeing that Donna wasn't changing, I close my eyes, feeling a sense of abandonment. Maybe the Tardis was telling me something, indiscreetly. Maybe there was no-one whose life I hadn't messed up, who didn't end up hating me, who would rather leave me alone to die-

**"Voice interface enabled."**

A child's voice, a light, soprano Scottish voice.

My eyes snap open, taking in the flickering vision before me, with a faint smile. **"Oh!" **I didn't expect this! She was dressed in the same nightdress and long blue coat from the night she waited for me, which makes prickles of guilt surge through me. **"Amelia Pond, before I got it all wrong."**

Definitively not mentioning that to Amy...

**"My sweet little Amelia..." **I whisper fondly, unable to control the words pouring out of my mouth no more than I can control the jerking as a result of the poison damaging my nerves.

**"I am not Amelia Pond, I am a voice interface."**

Her voice is dead, and she stares at me with no emotion.

**"Hey let's run away and have adventures together...Come along Pond!" **I give her a smile, but it's more of a grimace.

**"I am not Amelia Pond, I am a voice interface."**

**"Your _so _Scottish..." **I mumble incoherently, but speak louder and ask, **"How am I doing?"**

If I was expecting some sympathetic looks or tone from little Amelia, I couldn't have been more wrong, she pronounces this like a judge passing the death sentence, **"Your system has been contaminated by the poison of the Judas tree." **Judas tree...River needs to learn a lesson in originality, although she has the sentiment right.

Judas betrayed Jesus with a kiss.

River betrayed me with a kiss.

I plaster a hand the side of my throat, feeling my weak pulse, and slap a hand to my forehead, wiping the damp hair from my eyes. Every movement hurts like burning fire.

**"You will be dead in 32 minutes."**

Well, that's one way to cheer a dying person up! It's like telling a eight-year-old that Santa wasn't real (In fact he was, I visited him last year.)

**"OK, so basically what your saying is, better regenerate yeah?" **I say confidently, although my voice breaks towards the end of the sentence. I didn't want to regenerate (I would miss my hair...) but if it was between that and dying, I would rather live with a new, potentially ginger face.

**"Regeneration disabled."**

Damn Kovarian...she did her background check and homework well, getting a poison that made it impossible for me to regenerate...

**"You will be dead in 32 minutes."**

I didn't want to die! I want to live! I _need _to see River, tell her how I feel!

**"Unless I'm cured, yeah?" **Forever the optimist. There _had _to be a cure, it was anatomically impossible for there not to be a cu-

**"There is no cure. You will be dead in 32 minutes."**

No cure...guess my luck had finally run out...

No! I won't give up! I will not let a hologram tell me when I'm dying!

**"Why do you keep saying that?" **I demand.

**"Because you will be dead in 32 minutes."**

I lower the hand from my throat, and use the other hand to keep a safe grip on the railings, after feeling myself begin to lose strength. **"See, there you go again! Skipping 31 minutes when I'm absolutely fine! Scottish, that's all I'm saying..."**

**"You will be fine for 31 minutes. **You will be dead in 32 minutes."****

Her Scottish accent comes through in this statement, and I mutter, **"Scotland never conquered anywhere you know!" **That was true, I had visited Scotland in 8002, and they were a separate country from England, but their economy was dwindling...**"Not even a Shetland!" **I try not to talk; it's becoming more painful by the second, but then when I blink, and image of River, _my _River appears, and I open my eyes again, filled with determination. **"I can't die now! River _needs_ me! She's only just beginning, I can't die now!"**

**"You will not die now, you will die in 32 minutes."**

**"I'm going out in the first round, ring any bel-Agh!" **

The most painful yet. A crippling pain around my heart, causing me to crash to the floor, eyes nearly at the back of my head, fingers clinging to the floor as if trying to maintain a grip on reality. I lie down, the cool glass chilling my over-heated, fevered skin, one hand on my two hearts, trying to soothe the pain, the other keeping a hold on the floor.

Despite all the bravado I put as a defense system, I allow some of my vulnerable side to filter through. **"I need something for the pain now..." **I look up at her, and her unwavering emotionless stance. **"Come _on _Amelia, it's me!...Please!" **I reach out a hand towards her, hoping with everything I had that she would assist me. If I was going to die, I didn't want to be alone.

****"I am not Amelia Pond, I am a voice interface."****

Distress runs through me as she repeats these words. Can't she speak to me? Even lie; tell me it'll be okay, that the pain will go away? **"Amelia please...Listen to me..." **I whisper; my last chance. **"I can be brave for you..." **I can't be a broken, crying wreck for her, but if she wasn't here, that's what I would be. **"But you have to tell me how..."**

****"I am not Amelia Pond, I am a voice interface." ****

****"Amelia..."**** I whisper, barely able to form words. **"Please...please..."**

The floor is cold as I place my cheek on it, which is a small comfort. Lying there, sprawled on the Tardis floor, I allow myself to start succumbing to the pain, and let the darkness consume me before, **"Fish fingers and custard."**

These words act like a catalyst, allowing me the strength to pull away from the darkness and snap open my eyes, and stare at her. She looks the same, an uncaring robot, but the words were like music to my ears. **"What did you say?" **I murmur, with a huge grin and start to laugh despite myself. **"Fish fingers and custard?..."**

**"Oh Amelia Pond..." **She has added minutes onto my life, and I manage to go onto all fours, chanting, **"Fish." **

I reach for the nearest lever with a quaking hand, muttering, **"Fingers."**

With the other hand, I pull myself up, **"And."**

Grinning at Amelia, I yank down the lever, yelling, **"Custard!" **

With a bang, we were off.


	9. Doctor Who?

**_Thanks to my loyal reviewers! :D_**

**_And to my friend, (Yes I'll keep leaving you messages) Miss Burger isn't dead, nor a demon ;)_**

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><p>Using the remains of the lipstick River used that still lingered on my mouth, the Tardis homed in on her DNA and found her in a grand banquet hall in Berlin. According to my monitor today was the annual Dinner for the Nazi's and their paid wives (Of course, it wasn't phrased like this.)<p>

Reluctantly, but knowing it was for the ultimate good, even though I was actually _doing_ what River told me to do for once, I turned the brakes off, and landed us silently in the corner of the room, using the inconspicuous setting. (It didn't make the Tardis invisible, just if you looked at it you would look away instantly, distracted by another thought.)

I check the monitor that shows the exterior of the Tardis and see River is trying on clothes in front of a mirror, but thank everything good in the universe she wasn't naked, just adjusting a shirt.

Who was she trying to impress?

_Stop being jealous!_

I scolded myself, but as I start walking towards the door to meet her, I lurch, wincing in agony, forgetting that I could barely walk. I chewed my lip, in a dilemma. I wasn't going to go out there limping and dragging myself.

Suddenly I remember it. The sonic cane. I had created it mainly because I was bored and I thought it would look cool. It was a sonic, inside of a _cane!_ How cool was that?

The only problem was, actually finding it.

Figuring I may as well start somewhere, I travel through the long hallways of the Tardis, whispering, **"Fish fingers and custard..." **Repeatedly, until I came to my room, right next to the pool; I could smell the chlorine from here.

The brass nameplate with the Gallifreyan engravement, **"The Doctor's Room."**

I push open the door with a jerking arm, and groan at the mess. Discarded books, in all different languages, from Gallifreyan to English, from Russian to French, plus clothes and empty wrappers complete the mess. My bed is pushed up against the TARDIS-blue walls, and I examine there first, chucking books onto the floor and ripping the covers off to try and find it.

Once I have established that it's not on my bed, I feel the urge to lie down and just sleep...sleep until I die. Sleep when I die. Sleep after I die...

_I'm not abandoning River, Amy or Rory!_

I shut down all my senses, and go into automatic mode, it made things easier. I rifle through the cupboard, throwing empty cardboard boxes and a cricket bat onto my bed, hissing in annoyance. Where did I put it?

Something black underneath a long tan overcoat. I yank it out, and grin eagerly as I see it is the sonic cane. A long black cane with white at the bottom, where it would open, revealing the sonic.

Something else catches my eye. A black and white tux, with the black top hat that I wore to the Ponds' wedding. Smiling reminiscently, I fondly play with the cuffs, before looking at the cane then the suit, thinking hard.

If River was getting dressed up, two could play at this game.

Plus, if I was going to die, I was going out in style.

* * *

><p>The room is abandoned, with clothes lying strewn on the floor, and River, dressed in a blue uniform, was admiring a hat against her curls. To my surprise, Amy was standing there. The Tardis hadn't shown any other life forms in here except from River, which puzzled me greatly.<p>

Leaning against the still invisible Tardis, I decide to wait and see how events would unfold.

Amy is standing behind River, looking deadpan, her eyes glazed and standing staring at her; reminding me of the holographic younger version of herself.

**"Oh, regeneration! A whole new coloring to work with!"**

Women...

River pulls the hat off and discards it on the floor, while Amy stands by her side, saying in a dull monotone, **"You killed the Doctor-" **That's what they thought...**"On the orders of the Silence and the Academy of the Question." **The what? It wasn't just Kovarian? There was more than her? More people want me dead? **"You accept and know this to be true?" **

_Say no, say no, say no..._

**"To be honest, I don't remember it all, it's all a bit of a jumble." **River replies snidely.

Regeneration does mess with your brain; I was the prime example.

Light suddenly appears from Amy's open mouth, and engulfs River, leaving me lost for words, but as River starts to yell, **"No! Get off me!" **I react instinctively, leaning against the Tardis, sending a physic thought, **_"Inconspicuous mode off." _**

The Tardis and I appear, but neither Amy nor River notice.

At the sound of her yelling again, I intervene with a swift, **"Sorry, did you say she killed the Doctor?"**

Immediately, Amy stops firing beams of light at River, and they both turn, Amy looking neutral, River looked beyond flabbergasted.

I looked up from the floor, to the wall containing a swinging Swastika, murmuring thoughtfully, **"The Doctor?"**

I turn to face them, raising my eyebrows. **"Doctor Who?"**


	10. The Rules

**_Trotsky is better than Stalin, Stalin! Lenin preferred me..._**

**_Thanks to all my reviewers, and sorry about the random conversations I appear to be having with myself in these authors notes...:L_**

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><p>River recovers slowly, staring at me with shock, <strong>"Your dying, and you stopped to <em>change?" <em>**She demands, sounding outraged.

I beam at her, before twirling on the wooden floors with the cane, and leaping down the stairs, brandishing the cane at her. **"Always waste time when you don't have any." **I advised with a wink. **"Time is not the boss of you!" **I come to a halt in front of her, and tilt my head slightly, leaning heavily on the sonic cane. **"Rule 408."**

* * *

><p><strong><em>Flashback- A Good Man Goes to War<em>**

_"The anger of a good man is not a problem. Good men... have too many rules." _

_I turn, to see Kovarian standing there, looking boldly at me, and I can't suppress a jolt of anger as I see the woman who has caused all this heartache, who has taken the daughter of my two best friends._

_I see her crumble slightly as I step towards her, eyebrow raised, teeth set on edge. "Good men don't need rules. Today is not the day to find out _why I have so many."__

**_End Flashback_**

* * *

><p>I turn to Amy, staring at her with a light smile. <strong>"Amelia Pond, judgment death machine." <strong>Typical Amy...**"Why am I not surprised?"**

I flick the cane into the air, catching it lightly with my hand, and think, **_"Open."_** And the sonic device appears at the end of it. I face River, and grin evilly. **"Sonic cane." **I explain easily, and chuckle at her repulsed look.

**"Are you serious?"**

I step back to her, standing so I was just in front of her, and look at her with a childish grin. **"Never knowingly. Never knowingly be serious! Rule 27!"** I look at Amy again, then back at River. **"You might wanna write these down!"**

I study the results from the sonic, with mild surprise. Wow, whatever I was expecting, it wasn't this!

**"Oh, a robot!" **That explained the no-emotion and dead eyes. **"With 423 life signs inside!" **Wow, and I thought the Tardis was impressive! **"A robot..controlled by tiny people!"**

Tiny people were cool!

I glance back at a shifty-looking River, and beam, **"Love it!" **(_Resisting the urge to say, and you, was extremely difficult. It was only reminding myself that this was Melody Pond, not River Song.)_

**"But how do you all get in there though!" **I ask curiously. **"Bigger on the inside?" **I stare into the eyes again, but they remain blank. I check the sonic again, and this explains all. **"No! Basic miniaturization sustained by a compression field!" **Wow, that was fascinating! I would love to try-

**"Watch what you eat, it'll get you every time!" **I point out, remembering the story of the young, naive Glen Rodgers, who decided once being shrunk to eat at a 24 hour buffet...

**"Amy, if you and Rory are okay, signal me!" **I call loudly.

A tense couple of seconds, (Amy probably broke the sonic...) then, **"Thanking you!" **I say, relieved that they were at least alive.

**"Argh!" **

I can't help the scream being torn from my lungs as my leg buckles, sending me halfway to the floor, wincing. I try to move it, but it isn't responding; the posion must have reached the muscles now, tearing away and disintegrating them. **"Sorry, leg went to sleep!" **I yell, trying to remain partially upright by my right leg and using the cane, but I end up spinning in a circle trying to stand. **"Just had a quick left leg power nap!" **I try to stand, but my left leg refuses to co-operate, and I slide, before using the cane to remain aloft. **"Forgot I had one scheduled!" **Knowing that it would be impossible to stand, I see the stone steps, and sit on them, sighing with relief. **"Actually, better sit down, I think I heard the right one yawning!" **Well this was half-true, my right leg was jerking occasionally.

River; seeing me temporarily disabled, breaks into a run towards the door, and robot-Amy fires the beam of light at her again, causing River to shriek with pain.

_NO! I will not let them harm her! They will not touch her!_

**"Do not touch her, do not harm her in any way!" **I snarl, stamping the cane against the ground.

The light continues for half a second in which I am considering rugby-tackling the robot-Amy to the floor, despite the fact that I can't move my left leg, then, thankfully it stops, leaving River incapable to move, but unhurt and not in pain.

**"Why would you care? She's the woman who killed you!" **

I tip my head, pulling off the top hat, and grin at Amy's robot. **"But I'm not dead!"**

**"Your dying."**

Way to lighten the mood...

**"Well, at least I'm not a time-travelling shape-shifting robot controlled by miniturised cross people!" **I point out, rather snidely. **"Which I've got to admit, I didn't see coming."**

That was true; it was far from what I expected when I picked up the newspaper, was it only an hour ago?

I pick the cane up, pointing it at the immobilised River. **"What do you want with her?" **I ask, eyes squinted because my vision is started to impair.

**"She's Melody Pond. According to our records, she's the woman who kills the Doctor."**

Why does it concern them, who kills me? I don't even know these people!

**"And I'm the Doctor, so what's it to you?" **I ask, my grin concealing my annoyance.

A brief pause, before, **"Throughout time, many criminals have gone unpunished in their lifetimes." **

_So? That's how the world works! It's not fair, but it's life!_

**"Time travel has...reponsibilities."**

_Responsibilities! Seriously? The only responsibility is not undoing fixed points! _

**"So you got yourself time travel, and decided to punish dead people?" **I demand, eyebrows raised.

**"We don't kill them, we...extract them near the end of their established timelines."**

By the way whoever controlling Amy's voice says kill, it's giving me a strange feeling. If they don't kill them, what do they do?

**"Then what?"**

**"...Give them Hell."**


	11. Gotcha

I can't help the fury rising within me. _No-one_ had any right to do that! No-one had any right to judge whether a person had committed a crime, then punish them for eternity! And this whole business of time travel to do it?

It reminded me strangely of my own people. The Time Lords were arrogant with their use of time-travel, and I remembered stories of Time Lords doing similar things to what these miniature people were doing.

They wanted to be Time Lords.

That was it!

This made me angrier than before; being a Time Lord wasn't all it was cracked up to be.

**"I'd ask you who do you think you are, but I think that answer's pretty obvious." **I say quietly, lethally. **"So, who do you think I am?" **I demand, gesticulating wildly. **"The woman who killed the Doctor? Sounds like you have my biography in there, I'd love a peek!" **

I wonder what it said?

Doctor, 908 year old Time Lord, sole survivor of the Time War.

Would it know what I did?

**"Our records office is sealed to the public. Foreknowledge is dangerous."**

**"Well I'll be dead in 3 minutes," **Is that all the time I had left? 3 minutes to live...what was I supposed to do? Seems logical to want to review my long life, and actually confront the hurt I caused, the pain I was the core of, but yet, see the happiness that I had left in my wake. **"There isn't much foreknowledge left!"**

**"Sorry, can't do that."**

There is a pause, and I hear a woman's voice arguing with a man's, but their voices are too low to distinguish each word. **"Records available."**

They were actually going to show me?

Using the cane, and feeling like an old man, I used it to stand up, leaning heavily on it. **"Question..." **I mutter, using the cane to help me take a couple of steps, until I stood in front of robot Amy. **"I'm dying...Who wants me dead?" **I assume it was Kovarian, but this seems too large a scale now.

**"The Silence."**

The Silence? What are the Silence?

**"What are the Silence? Why is it called that, what does it mean?"**

**"The Silence are not a species, it is a religious order-" **So some group of fanatical worshipers wanted me dead? **"Or movement. Their core belief is that silence will fall when the question is asked."**

Question? There are a lot of questions! How are you? What are you up to? Even will you marry me?

**"What question?"**

**"The first question. The oldest question in the universe, hidden in plain sight."**

Plain sight? I think of all the obvious questions in the world, but none make me think that 'Silence will fall.'

**"But what is the question?"** I demand urgently.

There is a long pause, and I am on tenterhooks, waiting to hear. **"Unknown."**

_Seriously? Why does everything have to be so mysterious!_

**"Well fat lot of good that is, you big ginge! Call yourselves a Records-"**

I am interrupted by a scream, and it takes me a couple of seconds to register that it was me. A nuclear explosion inside of me causing me to double over in pain, before the cane slips out of my grasp, and I am on the floor, shaking and groaning in agony.

_Stupid, lazy kidneys..._

**"Kidneys are always the first to quit..." **I hiss, breathing in through my mouth in an attempt not to scream, as the impact of my now deceased kidneys kicked in. **"Oh, I've had better you know..."**

I've had _alot _better than this...

Suddenly, River starts yelling, her whole body shaking as it seems she has been doused in flames. _No...NO! _I can't let this happen...I can't lie here until I die, knowing that she will be in eternal pain!

Every movement is contaminated by pain, as I attempt to crawl towards her, arm outstretched, but I couldn't summon the energy to do anything more than crawl, and whisper, **"Amy...Rory...can you hear me?" **They were in the robot, they could stop this!

There is no reply for a second, but I refuse to give up, and continue inching my way towards the still screaming River, determined to save her, if it is the last thing I do.

I can hear distinct yelling and scuffling from the robot-Amy, and a gasp as River is released from her mini-Hell, and she stares at me with evident shock. **"You helped them...save me?" **She whispers, her voice cracking with surprise.

I abandon trying to reach her; it was always futile. She collapses on a chair, still staring at me thoughtfully. **"Guess what?" **I whisper hoarsely.

**"What?"**

**"Gotcha..."** The word is barely above a whisper, and I lie on the stone floor, letting the darkness consume me.

* * *

><p><strong><em>I've actually put a little clue in there about what I think the oldest question in the universe is! :D<em>**

**_Hope you liked! :D_**


	12. Death and All His Friends

_**I'm trying to get this all done by Saturday, so your in luck, another chapter! :D**_

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><p><strong>"Doctor help us! Doctor please!"<strong>

Amy's terrified voice echoes through me, causing me to jerk involuntarily. I open my eyes automatically, as another sobbed, **"Doctor help us!" **Ricochets through the room.

I groan as my whole body protests in me standing. Got to save them...need to save...Amy...Rory...

I wince again once I am standing, every joint, every muscle screaming at me to lie down, just give up...just give up...

NO!

I refuse to abandon Amy and Rory...need to save them...

I take a shaky step forward, but my legs refuse to co-operate and I tumble onto the stairs. **"Look at you..." **River whispers, awe-struck. **"You still care!"**

I still care about my two best friends, and her _parents _facing imminent death...need to save them...

**"It's impressive, I'll give you that..."**

**"River..." **I choke out desperately. **"Please..."**

**"Again!" **I hear the scrape of her chair as she stands, unnaturally loudly. **"Who is this River?"**

The woman I love...

Hearing her questioning her identity is painful, but not as painful as trying to drag myself up the stone steps. One hand outstretched towards the Tardis...nearly there...it seemed like a marathon to me, those couple of metres.

**"She's got to be a woman, am I right?"**

The most wonderful woman I had ever met.

**"Help me..." **I plead, trying in vain to summon the energy to lift myself up the steps. **"Save Amy and Rory...Help me..."**

**"Tell me about her."**

I stop trying to reach the door to the Tardis, and lay sprawled on the stone steps, feeling numb. **"Go on!"**

We don't have_ time_ for this! Have to save Amy and Rory...

**"Argh, just," **I yell angrily, but the anger deflates quicker than it appeared, and I feel tears prick at my eyes, as I begin to realize that she may not help me. **"Help me..."** I beg, voice shaking with tears.

I hear her shoes clicking off the floor, and I assume she is leaving, so I continue to lie there, breathing heavily. _She's abandoned me, and her parents. _I think numbly, but she crouches in front of me, eyebrows furrowed in concentration. **"What do I need to do?"** She asks finally.

With a sigh of relief, I look up at her. **"The Tardis...the blue...box...Go inside...it'll show you what to do..." **I whisper, and she looks confused but nods slowly, and a few minutes later, I hear the familiar vworp sound, and she is gone.

* * *

><p><strong>"Doctor!"<strong>

I open my eyes slowly to see Amy stumbling out of the Tardis, and rushing towards me. River stands far back, watching as her two parents kneel beside me on the stairs, and I give them a small wink.

**"You can't die now." **Amy says firmly, absolute in her belief. **"I _know _you don't die now!"**

And I know you know that I'm not supposed to die now.

**"Oh Pond, you've got a schedule for everything..." **I say with the faintest flicker of a smile.

**"But it doesn't make any sense!"**

**"Doctor, what can we do, come on! How can we help you?" **Rory, always the believer in a cure for everything bad in the world.

What can they do? There is nothing, nothing at all _anyone_ can do. Especially River...

No, I'm not thinking that. I'm not allowing her to do that for me. I would never be able to live with the guilt.

**"No, sorry Rory, you can't..._Nobody _**can." ****

And nobody _will._

Time is running out quicker than I had anticipated...I knew I wouldn't have a lot of time left, and I _had _to talk to River. **"Ponds, listen to me...I have to talk to your daughter."**

They look confused, but nod, and back away, Rory with a protective arm around Amy; who looks on the verge of tears.

River approaches me, reluctantly taking residence where Amy and Rory had been kneeling, and places a hand on my shoulder. At her touch, words spring out of my mouth. **"Find her...find River Song...and tell her something from me..."**

There was so many things I wanted to tell River, but I would have to settle for one.

**"Tell her what?"** She asks, looking puzzled, but bending over to listen.

**"Tell her that I love her, and I always will." **I whisper into her ear.

As she raises her head, and begins to speak, I take one last shuddering breathe, before the room disappears, and I am surrounded by infinite darkness.


	13. The Sacrifice

**_Since most of this chapter wasn't in the show, I had to invent some of it! So tell me if you like it :D _**

**_Anyone else mega excited about Night of Terrors tomorrow? :D_**

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><p>Death felt...cold. Freezing cold to be precise. I had always assumed death would be warm, but I could almost feel my eyelashes frozen together, and I couldn't supress a small shiver. I opened my eyes briefly, taking in a bright white room which hurt my eyes, so I closed them again.<p>

Well...being dead sucks...

I didn't think I would actually die...I had being going on the assumption that I would conduct a brilliant mastermind plan, then there would be lots of cheering and happiness and we would all go off again, and nearly get killed all over again. That's how things tended to happen in the Tardis.

The walls are bare, with only white paint. I close my eyes again, breathing through my mouth, panicking. Where was I?

I groan, opening my eyes again, but as I tried to sit up, I felt a warmth rush through me, filling me up. I closed my eyes again, and with a gasp of surprise and breathlessness, saw that I was back in the Berlin Dining Hall, with River leaning over me, wide grin on her face.

Still panting, I stared up at her, and saw that her hands were filled with the yellow regenerative light, and her hands were around my face.

_NO! She was not doing this for me! I am not letting her!_

**"River..." **I whisper, struggling to move, to fight her off, I wouldn't let her sacrifice her regenerations for me! **"No!"**

**"Hello sweetie..." **She whispers, her face lit up with happiness, and as I try to move away from her, she presses her lips against mine, making me lie still; despite the situation, feeling euphoric.

Raw energy rushed through me, filling me with adrenaline, as the yellow light dances around us. I can literally feel parts of my strength returning, but I am locked in this kiss with her.

After a few seconds, River suddenly keels over, and lies on the stone step; unconcious.

**"Doctor?" **

Amy's voice is low, scared. Lying where I was, I can only stare up at her; feeling paralysed with shock at what just happened.

No...NO! How could I have let this happen? I was so _stupid!_

I had _told _her, warned her there was nothing she could do!

**"She's got a pulse..." **Rory whispers, sounding hoarse and worried from beside me.

**"Doctor? Are you okay?" **

I feel it rise from my stomach, and turn to the opposite side of River, and retch, and feel acid in my throat, and pouring out of my mouth, before I collapse back on the floor, breathing heavily.

**"What happened?" **Amy demands.

**"River..."** I whisper, **"Used the rest of her...regenerations...to bring me back." **I wince, the words hurting me. She had sacrificed her ability to regenerate for me.

I had to recifty what she had done. I couldn't live with myself knowing that the reason she didn't regenerate in the Library was because she used them all up to save me.

I cast around wildly, trying to sit up, but an aching in my chest refused to let me, and Amy gently pushes me back down. **"What do you need?" **

Shiny silver...the bringer of death... look at Rory and point towards it with a shaking hand. **"The gun..." **

A Nazi Officer's abandoned gun lying beside Rory, and he looks at it, then at Amy. **"Why do you need it?" **He asks carefully.

**"To create a Leason Trealea..." **I invented wildly. I had to cause myself too much damage so I would regenerate, and do the exact same thing River did to me to her.

I wasn't even worried that I would never be able to regenerate again; in fact; I would prefer it to this crushing guilt.

**"Your going to do what she did to you back!" **Amy realized, taking the gun from Rory's hesitant hand and throwing it to the far side of the room.

No! That was my only chance of saving River from death in the Library!

**"Give me it!" **I snarl, fighting against her steady hand against my chest. **"Amy, I mean it!" **If I hadn't been so weak with posion, I would easily overcome her right now, but she has the advantage here.

**"No. River wouldn't want it!" **

**"I don't care what she would want!" **I try to budge her hand, but she remains absolute, and I see the pain in having to contain me in her eyes.

**"Amy please! You have to let me do this!" **I plead, halfway to tears.

Her bottom lip trembles, but she shakes her head. **"There must be something else we can do!" **

I stop, thinking hard, and look at Rory, who is standing back, looking nervous. **"The Tardis...pick up the reciever and type 1771, then when someone picks up, say it's the Doctor and there's an emergency, and we'll be there soon." **

Rory nods, mumbling the instructions to himself, before stepping into the Tardis. **"Go help him Pond." **

Amy looks hestitant, but she seems to think I am more myself, so runs in after him.

I stumble to my hands and knees, coughing violently, and turn to River. She isn't moving, and the rise and fall of her chest is subtle. Every movement is slow, every breath labored, but I am too determined to care. I pull her into my arms, and try to stand, but nearly fall with the effort.

I brace myself, and stand up shakingly, River in my arms. I take one step forward, then two...nearly there...It hurt so much...but I had to help her...

* * *

><p><strong>"You have to let go of her Doctor!" <strong>

The hospital is packed with people running to and fro, and someone takes River out of my arms, and before I can protest, she is placed on a gurney and being pulled away. I try to run after her, but am restrained by someone.

**"We have to do some checks Doctor, you still have some posion left-"**

**"I have to see her!" **I yell wildly, struggling against them, hand outstretched towards the woman I love being taken away from me. **"River!" **

**"Sedate him..." **Someone whispers from behind me, and I feel something cold enter my neck before feeling someone catch me as the room goes fuzzy, then black.


	14. The Promise

**_Again, this wasn't in the show, so I had to make it up! Hope you like!_**

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><p>The low beep...beep...of a heart monitor awakes me. I open my eyes, feeling groggy. I tried to remember what happened, but it's all a blur. Groaning, I sit up, and see that my hands are tied to either side of the bed by plastic restraints. I look at the heart monitor, which is two red lines, ducking and diving and crossing each other, omitting the occasional, beep!<p>

I look around the small room, and see Amy is curled up on an armchair beside the bed, head resting against the arm.

**"Pond...Pond...Amy...AMY!...Wake up!" **I whisper, my voice cracked.

She jumps, startled, and looks delighted, but sheepish. **"You're awake!"**

**"Where's...River?" **I ask slowly, painfully.

Her face creases. **"She's in another room. Rory's watching her, we've been alternating between rooms." **My face must reveal how I feel, so she continues, **"She's stable, the doctors say we'll just have to wait and see what happens."**

I nod, and look down at myself. I am shirtless, and wearing a pair of light blue trousers. Attatched to my chest are various wires and contraptions, and an IV drip is attatched to my arm.

**"What room is she in?" **I ask lightly, casually.

She looks at me with dissaproval, but sees the restraints and knows I won't be going anywhere soon. **"One-Oh-One." **

I nod, committing this to memory. I _would _find her, no matter what any Doctor said. **"How long have I been...out?"**

**"Around 12 hours I think...the doctors said you still had the Judas stuff in your system, so they had to clear it out." **Her face suddenly screws up, and she looks melancholy, **"You kept waking up and being sick...then you kept screaming when you were...out." **

I wince, remembering the vivid dream I had about River chasing me through Berlin with a knife, trying to kill me, before eventually killing herself...

**"I'm going to tell Rory you're awake!" **She says brightly, and I nod, then she leaves.

The second the door clicks behind her, I tug on the restraints, but they refuse to budge. I see the sonic, but it is lying on a cabinet, out of reach.

Almost snarling in annoyance, I try to bend down and bite them off, but only manage to leave a faint mark. **"Damn it!" **I shake them again, trying to loosen them, but they don't even budge.

Summoning a picture of River in my mind gives me strength. I breathe slowly, then pull the restraints, wincing as it cut into my wrists, leaving them cut and bleeding, then to my surprise, they snap in half, freeing my hand. With my free hand, I easily untie the other one, and jump out of the bed, nearly falling since I haven't moved out the bed in 12 hours. I pick up the sonic, and rip off the monitors from my chest and arms, and hear a piercing alarm, so I hide behind the door, and when three nurses run in, I slip past, and yank the door shut, sonicing it locked.

Room 101...Where was it? I glanced at my room number-98. She must be around here somewhere. The room to my right is 100, so I dash two doors down, using the walls as support.

Amy and Rory were talking in excited whispers, but they would occasionally glance at their daughter, looking scared and sad. When I burst into the room and nearly fall over my two feet, they look alarmed. **"Doctor!" **Amy scolds, and tries to push me back out the door, but I swat her arms away.

**"I have to see her..." **I mumble, and approach the foot of the bed. River is hooked up to machines, and her eyes are clamped shut, but the regular beep of the heart monitor show she is still alive. I sit down on the armchair beside her bed, and take one of her hands. They are freezing, but soon, my Time Lord temperature begins to heat them.

Amy has left the room; probably to tell someone that I have left my room, and I hear Rory approach me, and put a hand on my shoulder. **"You love her don't you?" **He murmurs, and I don't even hesitate before nodding. **"Well, at least I won't have to worry about the awkward meeting with the son-in-law."**

I laugh, and he leaves the room, and I hear brief arguing outside the room (They obviously think I can't hear them, but my keen hearing makes it easy.)

**"Just give him five minutes!"**

**"He died, Mr Williams! We aren't jeopardizing his life so he can sit with her!"**

**"That's Mr Pond, and yes, we can."**

**"Fine. Leave him for five minutes."**

I turn to River again, and stroke a curl of hair from her eyes. **"Look at me, eh?"** I laugh softly. **"Silly old man...sitting talking to someone who can't talk back!" **I look at the monitor again- just a precaution. **"Why did you do it River...you _knew_ I would never want you to sacrifice your regeneration's..." **

I check the clock, only three minutes left. I look back at her again with a sigh. **"How can you put a time limit on me telling you I love you?" **I stop, swallowing nervously. **"There, I said it. I finally worked up the courage to tell you, but you'll never know I did. It's funny how things work out..." **

I run a hand through my unkempt hair, sighing. **"Then I'll have to leave. I know what happens to you River, I know your end, and now I know your beginning. I can't even risk going near you...who knows what would happen?" **The thought of leaving her, for any period of time, was heart-breaking. **"We'll probably never be be together, but that's okay, because I know that you grow up to be the most _amazing _person ever. Never forget that your River Song now."**

The door flies open, and a doctor walks in, accompanied by a flustered looking Amy and Rory, who are smiling at me. **"Time to go back to your room, Doctor." **He says in a kind tone. I nod, and kiss River's forehead, before leaving the room.

* * *

><p><strong><em>See, the Doctor, unlike a certain Sparkle-Face, knows when it's better to leave the ones we love for their own good, because he knows she'll be okay without him!<em>**

**_Hope you liked! Only one more chapter left! :o_**


	15. The Doctor Lies

**"I take it you're bored then?" **

I look up to see Amy strolling into the room with two cups of coffee in Styrofoam cups, grinning at me, which I returned. It had been three days since I had told an unconscious River that I loved her, and I had spent the last three days either talking to the Ponds', demanding the doctors let me see River, demanding that they let me leave...demanding that they try harder to help River...

Yeah, so I was demanding, we get the point!

But mostly, I had been doing this. Soggy pieces of new paper hung around the room on washing lines, held up by pegs. I now sat with the front cover, and two pots of paint from the Tardis, that were exactly her shade, and I was now painting them delicately.

**"Just a tad." **I grin easily, as she sits at the foot of my bed, and hands me the cup.

The Sisters of the Infinite Schism had refused to let me leave yet, insisting that I was too weak, and too in danger of my heart going into bypass failure...and a bunch of other things that I hadn't paid attention to.

After seeing me literally lose my mind with boredom by sitting on the bed for half an hour, they decided to let me do my project. I had remembered River's Tardis diary, and decided to make it myself instead of going out and buying one.

I take a sip of the coffee; which doesn't taste half-bad.

**"How are you feeling?"**

I look at the bed sheets instead of looking at Amy. Reality-Bored out of my mind, worried sick, and occasionally in pain.

My answer, **"I'm okay, Amy. I'm always okay."**

She doesn't look like she believes me, but we sit in silence for a couple of minutes, me painting the diary, her sitting examining the room. **"Where's Rory?" **I ask conversationally. Him and Amy had taken to spending all day in the hospital, alternating between sitting with River and visiting me, then, at my insistence, sleeping in the Tardis, which was still parked in the middle of the foyer from when we came in.

**"He's with River."**

I nod, feeling jealous that he got to sit with her, but I was forced to stay in this room (20 feet by 20 feet, I got so bored after the first twenty minutes I had stayed in this room that I counted) for the past three days.

**"How is she?" **I ask, trying to appear nonchalant, but failing.

**"Doctors said it's possible she'll wake up today." **She grins as I stand quickly, spilling blue paint over the sheets.

**"Really?" **I demand, searching her face for signs of sarcasm, but she shakes her head wildly, laughing.

**"Really! And they said that if you actually _sat down _for five minutes and allowed them near you, then you might be able to leave!" **

I feel despair at her words. Now I had to face up to the inevitable, and my promise that I would leave her here. **"That's great." **I enthuse, but only half-heartily.

**"You really do love her, don't you?" **Amy asks, with a small smile.

**"Really being an understatement." **I smile, and she grins wickedly at me.

**"You know, if you two got married-" **I winced at the thought of something that could never be,**"-Then I would be your mother-in-law!"**

**"Doesn't that mean we hate each other?" **I ask, the smile of my face getting wider.

**"Yup!"**

A doctor walks in, smiling. **"Great news Doctor-" **(This had been a source of hilarity in the hospital, whenever someone yelled, Doctor! About fifty people turned round, me one of them) **"-Your allowed to leave! On the condition that you take it easy!" **He adds, grinning.

* * *

><p>After I had showered and changed into my usual tweed jacket and trousers in the Tardis, I heard the phone ringing as I walked into the console room. I skipped over, and picked it up.<p>

**"Doctor speaking."**

**"Doctor...she's waking up...Doctor, are you there? Doctor!" **

As soon as Amy said the first four words, I had dropped the phone and ran towards the door.

* * *

><p>Her eyes were slowly opening as I stepped out of the Tardis. (Yes, I parked it in a hospital room!) Amy and Rory stand over her, their faces lit up with parental concern. I lean against the a closet, feeling it was best if River talked to her parents first.<p>

**"Hey." **Amy whispers gently.

**"Hey." **River's voice is soft and tugs at my heartstrings. Her eyes look around for a couple of seconds before focusing on her parents. **"Where am I?"**

**"You're safe now. Apparently you used all your regenerations in one go." **Amy explains, and my mouth suddenly feels like it's a desert;I feel so guilty. **"You shouldn't have done that."**

**"Mother...I had to try." **They both smile weakly at each other as Amy says, **"I know."**

**"He said no-one could save him...but he must've known I could..." **

Of course I knew. _This _is the reason I didn't tell her. So I wouldn't be standing here.

**"Rule One." **I whisper, overwhelming guilt crushing me, and they turn to face me. **"The Doctor lies."**

River smiles, then closes her eyes again. I turn to the nurse, who smiles reassuringly at us. **"She just needs to rest, she'll be absolutely fine."**

Fine? No-one described _River Song_ as fine!

**"No she won't." **I stare down at her, eyes filled with sorrow at the fact that I had to leave her. **"She'll be more than fine." **I say quietly, setting my finished diary onto her bedside cabinet. **"She will be amazing."**

With one final look at the woman who owned my hearts, I gestured for the Ponds' to follow me into the Tardis.

* * *

><p>I flick a lever of the Tardis, feeling numb. Fingering a couple of the gizmo's to make it look as if I am actually doing something, I think about River. I can't stop thinking about her. She's on my mind all the time now.<p>

**"So that's it? We just leave her there then?" **

I look up at Amy, attempting a cheerful smile. **"Sisters of the Infinite Schism. Best hospital in the universe."**

And they had better live up to their title...

I stare at the screen that has my picture on it, vaguely hearing Amy say, **"Yeah but she's our daughter! Doctor, she's River...and she's our daughter!" **

I tear my look away from the screen, filled with the data I downloaded from the Robot Amy, and look at the real Amy. **"Amy I know...but we have to let her make her own way now. We have too much foreknowledge." **I glance at the screen at this word.

I looked upon the data that pronounced my death, whispering, **"Dangerous thing...foreknowledge."**

**"What's that?" **Amy asks curiously, looking at the screen, which I immediately disable. **"Oh nothing, just some data I downloaded from the Teselecta, very boring!"** It's funny really, how quickly they swallow a lie.

**"Doctor?" **Rory sounds confused, still trying to suss things out. **"River was brainwashed to kill you...-"**

**"Well she did, but she used her remaining regenerations to bring me back." **I explain, furrowing my brow. **"As first dates go, I'd say that was mixed signals."**

**"But all that stuff in her head, it's gone now?" **I freeze as he continues talking, unwilling to answer his question. **"The River we know from the future, she's in prison for murder..."**

**"Whose murder?"** Amy demands, raising an eyebrow.

I look at her, then the screen, then back at her, with a huge smile, which she echoes, in an almost, _I knew he wouldn't tell me..._manner.

**"Will we ever see her again?"**

I fly around the console, lovingly pulling levers and flicking devices. **"Oh, she'll come looking for us!" **

_Here's hoping..._

**"How do people even look for you?"**

I hesitate halfway up the steps, and I turn to face them, eyes and face lit with passionate eagerness. **"Oh Pond...haven't we figured that one out yet?"**

With a huge grin, we are off, flying through space on our next adventure.

And who knew where that would be?

* * *

><p><em><strong>Firstly, the thanks!<strong>_

_**MayFairy, betawho , My anons :D, Kentastic72, AngelsOnTheMoon98, Kirisutokyotode,shirley loves doctor who, Random Ruth and of course, my dear friend Stalin, who I kept leaving random authors notes for :D Without you guys there wouldn't be a story so thanks!**_

_**I hope you liked it! :D**_

_**And remember your pillows for tomorrow folks...it looks scary!**_

_**Alons-y!**_


	16. The Sequel Has Begun!

Hey guys!

It's just to say I've started a sort-of sequel to this!

It's set after Let's Kill Hitler, and is about the Doctor visiting River and their romance starting!

I don't know if it will be a one-shot or not, I'll see :D

.net/s/7364646/1/Your_Guardian_Angel

Hope you like!

~WLG~


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